Kyrie’s Rants & InSaNiTiEs

Archive for June 2008

Yesterday was my last day at work before I go off to celebrate Alex’s birthday with Craig’s family. I knew it was going to be a good tip day, I just had a feeling. Midmorning I get a 2 1/2 hour massage, and I start thinking what am I going to do for 2 and a half hours. I mean really there is only so much you can usually do on someone before you’re just… well bored and repeating yourself.  I called the coordinator’s to make sure that it was only one person and they say they’re not sure take two sets of sheets just to be sure.  I’m a bit happier because I think that it will be broken up and easier to manage.

But about an hour before the massage I get this weird feeling that I need to draft a text and have it ready to send just in case something goes wrong. I’ve never felt the need to do this before ever, but over the years I’ve learned that if I don’t follow my instincts bad things happen.  So I wrote the text and had it ready to send to about 15 people just in case. I’d rather be prepared than not.

I get to the room and he’s in his robe the lights are turned down low and its only him, there is no one else there. The minute I walked into the darkened room my dragon started screaming. I asked him when he’s last had a massage and he says about four months ago. I make a bit more small talk as I finish setting up the table and getting ready.

He asks if he can charge the massage to the room, and I tell him of course thats not a problem. He goes into the bathroom and comes out with some money and tells me this is my tip. I smile take the money without counting it, (that’s rude) and put it in my pocket. Now my dragon is shrieking and waving her hands in the air. It’s never a good sign when they tip you before hand they always think they’ve bought a happy ending when they tip up front. Now I’m a bit more nervous, but in that calm deadly way you get before you know you have to deal with something you don’t want to, and would rather avoid.

I wash my hands let him get settled on the table and come back relieved to find he’s actually gotten in between the sheets as I requested. You’d be surprised how many people like to pretend they don’t understand get between the sheets.

The first 2 hours of the massage are uneventful and go by quickly enough. I have him turn over and start working on his right leg after I finish I redrape and go walk around the table. As I move around the table I realize that he’s started jerking off. I wait a few seconds to make sure he’s not just adjusting, but as the bulge gets larger I start getting angry.

I told him, you need to stop or I am leaving. He half sits up and says…what? I repeat myself in that angry I am going to kill you in the next ten seconds if you don’t do what I want voice that I love so much. It’s very effective. He jerks his hand back and settles angrily on the table.  I finish up the massage, making sure to go a bit more deeply then I needed to.  I tell him I’m done and going to wash my hands, while he gets dressed I lock the bathroom door and wash my hands.

When I get back into the room, he’s in the bed jerking off again. I give him a very angry look as he signs the ticket and leave.  Once I get out into the hall way I check to see how much he tipped me. $700.00, plus the commission on the massage …I don’t care how much money you tip me you are not jerking off on my table.

I think I need a button that says “Touch your dick at your own risk. May result in death or amputation.”  Just to clear up any misconceptions before I start the massage. Yep I think so.


Today was one of those lazy summer days where you just hang out go to the local pool and then come home and play pool. We have a really great water park about a block from our house. Today was the first time we went but I’m sure we will be a fixture there this summer. Here are some pictures from the water park.

Little Kids Area

This is the little kids area, where anyone not big enough for the water slides goes. There are a ton of different places where the kids can try to spray the adults on the side lines. Boy you should have seen some of their faces when they got the life guards wet.

You can’t really see them behind the equipment, but the lost boys are up there trying to spray me with water while I take this picture.

Big Kids Area

This is the big kids area where you can ride the two slides. The kids were disappointed for a few moments when they realized they wouldn’t be riding them this summer. Kayden is still 3 inches to short to ride so Craig decided it was best to tell them they were both just a tad to short to ride. Though Kayden assures me that he will be growing 3 inches by the next time they come. Hopeful thinking on his part I think.

Spray the Adults

You see that red handle that kid in the red shorts is turning…well every time they turn it, it turns the water on from above and sprays all the adults just standing at the edge of the pool. Sometimes you see kids sitting down there with an evil smile just waiting for some unsuspecting person to wander by.

Happy Playful Brothers

Alex and Kaden spent a bit of time in between their playing posing for the camera.


Smile Kayden!

Then they decided to play a bit of tag with their dad.

Playing Tag

Your It!

Then they called a pool break, which I’ve never heard of before where everyone gets out of the pool and stands around for 10 minutes while they wander about in the pool pretending to be looking for something on the bottom. Really I think they just want 10 minutes while they wander in the water and laugh and the idiots dying in the heat but unable to get in the pool.

Pool Break

So we decided to take some family pictures. First Alex took the pictures and then Kayden. After that Craig asked someone to take a picture of all of us.

Kayden, Me & Craig

What bunny ears!

All of us together

Then Alex took a picture of just Craig and I and I took some pictures of the boys

Craig & I

Tormenting His Brother

Torment Torment

I love Kayden’s expression in the picture. Next we went home and played a bit of pool. Most of these next shots Kayden took. He did a really good job.


Look It\'s a Mask!

So mysterious

Making Faces

Kayden tried making faces when he realized Alex was about to win the game, but alas Alex was victorious…well right until the cue ball went in after the “magic 8 ball” as the lost boys call it.


He’s so stoic in his victory. Then Kayden tried taking a few pics of Craig and I…but Craig says I can’t show his picture.Noooo Not the 8!! So I’ll give you this picture Kayden took of Alex begging the 8 ball not to go in.

So I had a great trip down to Ohio, I stayed a bit longer then anticipated but I’ll get into that later. Our first day there I got picked up from the Airport at 6am and we headed out to Cedar Point Amusement Park. Which is considered the Roller Coaster Capital of the world. It was one of the most exhausting and fun times I’ve had. None of us had slept at all the night before on some of the rides we spent over an hour and half waiting in line. Which means that we’d almost be asleep by the time we got up to the ride. Then we’d have a 2seckick of major adrenaline which would last us until we got into line for the next long wait.

This is the Entrance and the parking lot at Cedar Point, which is set on a lake so there are a lot of boats and such along the road as you drive up.

Another view of the park from the parking lot.

Overview of the park.

Entrance to the park.

The first ride we went on was called the Raptor, and you sit with your feet dangling out into the air. It was totally awesome, however the wait was about 1 1/2 hours. I only have a picture of half the line because I couldn’t get a good angle of the other half.

Alas only half of the line.

Silly Girls standing in line

More Raptor riding...


After that I’m not quiet sure which ride we went to next…it so hot and humid that you stood there praying for shade and guzzling water. Well you wanted to Guzzle water but at $3.00 a bottle you sipped the water.

I think we went to the Power Tower next which takes up 240ft in the air and drops you…or you can go to the other side where they shoot you 240 ft in the air. Either way, I’d been on one of these before, but it was probably only 100 and some feet. This was terrifying I think we all started freaking out when we realized we weren’t even half way to the top and it was way higher then I ever wanted to be dropped from again. There are better pictures if you click the Power Tower link, along with all the ride details and such.

Power Tower

After that we were all very very glad we had not eaten anything yet, because it made us all a little but sick to your tummies.

Wooden Roller Coaster

Gemini Close up

This is the Gemini which is one of the parks wooden roller coasters…they take two coasters out at the same time and you can get close enough to actually touch the other people. The wooden ones shake you right out of your bra if you’re not careful. I didn’t really believe Erica when she said that, I tend to have good bra’s….they didn’t help in this case.

Beginnging of the line for the Mavrick.

This is the beginning of the line for the Maverick, which took a very very long time. A nice lady took a picture of us all, which is why we are all in the frame for this one. My hair is got progressively more poofy the long I stayed in Ohio…which is why I could never live there.

Almost to the front for the Maverick.

I think that Candi has that worried look on her face because we were all hungry and not sure we’d make it to the ride without dying from starvation before it was our turn.

Erica, Me & Snoopy

Snooy and the girls.

I guess most theme parks have a cartoon character, Snoopy is Cedar Points character. They have whole stores full of snoopy stuff.

Random silliness in line.

Pose for us Erica!

Candi and her water bottle.

One more pose for JanetteWe decided to leave when we were to tired to walk anymore around 5:30 in the evening. Poor Erica had to drive back in a silent car where all her friends were sleeping. Which is what she wanted to do too, but she got us all home safely.

Bunny Foo Ying\'s Cage

Me & Foo Ying

Donna had the sweetie little dwarf rabbit named Bunny Foo Ying. She’s very very sweet and snuggly and during the day when she isn’t running free in the living room she hangs out in her mini condo. If you try to touch her blanket she jumps at you and grunts very fiercely. I want one…but Craig says no…sigh.

Donna lives in a tree house…

On the porch

Tree House

This is Calla Lily’s Store front I helped pick out the chairs out front. If you look really close you can see my reflection in the window. The open house was a lot of fun and I had a great time shopping and hanging out with the Girls from Calla Lily. They were all very very funny and I made a lot of great new friends who I plan to keep in touch with through Ravelry. If you haven’t been to Ravelry and you knit you should really check it out. It’s a knitters paradise. You can find me there under the nick Kyrie. I hang out on the forums a lot and I’m normally posting on either the Wow board, Calla Lily’s Girls or the Knit Las Vegas board. You can post all your knitting projects there and find out how other people used the same pattern. I really love it and highly recommend it.

So after the grand opening of Calla Lily’s we went down to Columbus and played at TNNA which is an invite only event. If you are not a store owner the you can’t get in. Since Donna just opened her store we all were able to go. Unfortunately they did not allow any cameras in so I got no fun pictures of yarn. We did meet Jess and Casey from Ravelry, they were very very nice. We didn’t get to see the Yarn Harlot though because her book signing was the day before. There were a ton of shops there. We didn’t even get through all of the yarn shops before we finally left. However we did get some really great yarns and I can’t wait to get some of them.

Tuesday when we went back to the airport we spent 6 hrs waiting for our plane, which was very frustrating because our plane was sitting at the gate. Really we were waiting for our pilot who was stuck in Newark because of the weather. Due to cuts of their staff they didn’t have anyone else who could take the flight. Needless to say there were about 200 very angry customers. We weren’t able to get another flight out until Thursday, so we had to call in to work and both take a point so as not to get into more trouble for missing work.

We came back and had an impromptu knit night at Calla Lily’s which was a great deal of fun and then we got up at 545 (we were supposed to be up earlier) and made a mad dash for the airport to catch our flight. Which we did manage to do, the flight home was very very long.

Donna & I

I texted craig that I had landed and he told me he had locked my keys in the car. I called Road side assistance and he spent the next 45 minutes trying to break into my car while we waited. Once the car guy arrived he had it open in like 3 minutes. The lost boys thought that was very awesome. And that was my adventure…

Oh yeah I bought some yarn…

AslanTrends Class


Comfort DK

I also got a few stitch markers which I love.

I started the Modern Lace Henley from Knitty so far I am just below the increases on the way up the back.

Modern Lace Henley

As well I went shopping over at Gallery at the Vault they had some really sweet Witch Balls, which I’ve been looking for a long time. Mostly I haven’t bought them before now because of price and getting them home. But these were just perfect.

I got the blue one for our room, the purple is Kayden’s and the red for Alex.

Donna got the boys some really cute socks for helping me out. They are called a Pair with a spare. They don’t match at all which is why it comes with three socks and you can mix and match them.

Pair & A Spare
The Lost Boys absolutely loved their socks and had fun posing for pictures in them. Alex told me they were the most comfortable socks he’s worn in a long long time.

Alex is looking forward to world peace.


Boys Posing for the camera

Cool and relaxed

So I am packing for Ohio…where I will be attending Calla Lily Yarn & Gifts Grand opening! As well as  the TNNA trade show. Which has something to do with needle crafts or some such. Though I am excited because the Yarn Harlot will be there  AND the creators of Ravelry will be there as well as…and this is the really really exciting part….wait for it…a lot of yarn and roving and possibly a spinning wheel. Which I couldn’t get back on the plane anyway so I’m trying not to think about that.

Look look that’s my new sweater all finished and happily packed away! And this is me in my Cardi.

I am so excited with how well this turned out and I know I will love wearing it. I made it out of 100% Alpaca…which I am now running low on, so since my birthday is coming up I hear there are some Alpaca’s that need a new home.

I STILL have not figured out what I’m taking to knit on the trip…this kinds of scares me because originally I had planned to knit on my cardi…but then I finished it. I didn’t mean to I fully intended to work on it on the plane. It’s easy stockinette knitting, however it flew by so fast, considering I only started it on Monday.

Which means I now have to figure out what I’m going to knit for the next 5 days. Which I totally did not realize would be 5 days until I was trying to figure out what to pack. Then I started counting, I paused and counted again and then just to make sure I was right, (I’m dyslexic I have to check more then once) I counted it on my fingers and realized…oh thats why Craig has been a tad….grumpy.  Five days away suddenly seems like a really long time.

We bought a pool table today and it will be delivered tomorrow though so while I’m sure Craig will be inconsolable without me (for like 10 minutes) he’ll get along well enough inviting everyone over for pool and drinks.

The lost boys happily finished their school year and are very excited about their summer. Though one or two of the lost boys seem to be a bit mistaken about how often we will be at the pool swimming. I’m sure we’ll be there often, but they seem to be under the impression every day is pool day. I know I have some new photos of them somewhere but I can’t find them right now and I now have….Ack!! half an hour to figure out what yarn I am taking on the trip!! I’m off like a herd of turtles….see ya’ll when I get back.

So I have been running around making projects for the last 4 weeks. And finally everything is finished.  I forgot to get pictures of Hannah’s yarn but it turned out beautifully. You’ll have to make due with a picture of me dyeing…

Then I sewed 2 belly dancing outfits for Katie…

Then I made 30 row counting bracelets, which I didn’t get pictures of either…as well as sent of 3 skeins of yarn for their Grand opening.

And I have finished my Cavern Cardi..almost I just have to add the i-cord ties today.

Now I have to run before I’m late for work…oh yeah I’m off to Ohio tonight for my trip.

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June 2008
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